Middle Class - Sharing A Room, Sharing Time And Sharing Life

Middle-class families, we all have heard this term. Mostly concerning economics. Based on the country's purchasing power, the middle-class changes. In a developing country, the middle class is perhaps not as wealthy as the middle class in a superpower country. This blog is not about economics but more about family. Also, my knowledge is limited to the country I was born in. In India, the middle class has grown to now influence most of the institutions of this country.

Again, this blog is not about the influence of the middle class on India's socio-economy.

Then what is this blog about? Coming to the point...

About 100 years back, the middle class was a family of many brothers living with their children. The house comprised 10 rooms but then divided by the number of people meant every room had 3 or more people sharing the room. 

The middle-class family had individuals who shared rooms; when you shared a room, you shared life.

The generation that grew up in such a house with cousins and uncles, aunts, and grandparents always felt they had no privacy. This generation grew out of the house and came to little cities.

In these cities, they found much smaller houses. These were the parents who had 2 or maybe 3 children. They lived in a tiny house with two bedrooms. The children ended up sharing the room with their siblings. 

Life was earlier shared with cousins; now, it is shared with siblings. The room had walls that were owned by different children. 

There was fun but yet no privacy.

Then, when these children grew out of their homes and travelled to different cities or houses in the same city, they limited themselves to one child. But separating from their parents with a part of the inheritance meant they had lesser purchasing power limiting the space they could buy. 

They were now living in a one-bedroom hall home. The bedroom was shared by the mother, father and child.

The child had to now share the room with her parents. The parents were working, and the child was sharing the room, sharing her life but primarily alone. They had limited time to share. 

And then came a generation that would limit their family based on the rooms. We have a room for parents, one room for the lone child and another spare one used for studying, gaming or, at times working from home.

Rooms are not shared anymore, time is not shared anymore, and with that, life is not shared anymore. 

In conclusion, there is no conclusion. If anything, this is just an observation. Perhaps an observation that everyone might not agree with, but that is fine. There are some problems when you share your room with others, and there are other problems when you have a room but no one else to share it with.

Kashmir - India's Problem Child

                                      ....among multiple FB posts and twitters reactions asking India to teach Pakistan a lesson and some about Pakistanis should leave India we have forgotten Kashmir again.

                                      There was an attack in Uri, an attack in Pathankoat and there were so many other attacks that happened all over India most claimed by India to be done by Pakistan. India gave multiple proofs and used all international pressure but it did not work.
                                      My blog is not about India Pakistan problem because that involves a lot of things which we as common citizens miss out on, the role of China, interests of America and then there is Pakistan internal problem. If one sees the pattern whenever there is an elected government in Pakistan terrorist activities sponsored by their army increases in an attempt to destabilize the government and get the power back in hands of the army....now onto Kashmir

                                     Kashmir is old very old, for sure older than the democratic India. Kashmiris have lived generations being pawn of some ruler or an invader. In 1947 too Kashmir was complicated and it finally got divided just like Punjab and Bangla. Then for years we saw Kashmir in movies and some of us were lucky enough to see it ourself. The houseboats, the snow, the temples and what nice people greeting with smile and warm. Towards the end of 80s we had the massacre of Kashmiri Pandits and since then things have only gone downwards.

                                     Kashmiris have been under army rule for almost 3 decades and it does not look like things will be normal anytime soon. Kashmiri pandit needs justice, some say but justice itself is an imaginary term. What is justice for you might not be justice for someone else. So we really cannot promise justice for them but a peaceful valley with people living in love and harmony is the best thing we can do for the Pandits. Imagine a Kashmir where the locals live together celebrating each others festivals, why imagine? this is how it used to be 3 decades back.

                                     Then we decided to get involved with the Bangladesh independence struggle and later on Pakistan decided to fume a new fire in Kashmir to get it independent. Yes, Kashmir is India's problem child today. So yes Kashmir very much belongs to India there is no point questioning that.
                                       But when we say Kashmir belongs to India what are we talking about? Is it the mountains, rivers, temples, snow, perfect skies or soothing summers?
                                   
                                       When we say Kashmir is ours and we will never give up on it, are we conveniently forgetting Kashmiris. May be we are so you see an angry citizen talking of killing all people in Kashmir and taking control over it. Yes! they don't want us, they might not love us they might be hating us. Yes! they won't be safe independent, Pakistan-China will use them, they will be treated secondary citizen.

                                      So we have a child that hates his parent, he believes he is an adopted child, a child that is conspiring to kill his own brothers for he thinks he is not given his dues, a child that want to flee to the neighbor's house cause the neighbors are showing dream which is far better than the reality today.

                                      Question is what do we do  about it ? Do we want to behave like an invader and take over Kashmir no matter how many we kill and yes in that case we will end up killing small children, helpless woman and ailing old people the bomb or bullet does not check its victim.

                                       Can we still give the love to the child even when he clearly does not care for yours ? The answer can be YES or NO, it can also be we will keep trying.

                                         If your answer is NO, we really don't deserve kashmir or for that matter any other region cause all these regions have their own personal issues with the state. Just like every child has some complain about his brother, mother, father or family in general. Do we kick the child out, do we give this child his own space or do we explain him and talk to him with calm and composure.
The most difficult is the third option cause the child will keep breaking our heart...but that is the one way we can get back that Child who will love us back and even fight for his mother...and not against it.

Have we realized the problem ?

...and the news is flashed on television of a 22 year old boy turned militant or terrorist or separatist, precisely enemy of state...
Followed by reactions of every person who gets a mic, camera or internet....

Most reactions are about solving the problem assuming that the problem is realized...

Have we realized the problem ?
We are using our eyes to see and brain to react on what we see.
Has the saying what we see is the truth really blinded us ?

Have we realized the problem ?
Are we listening to both sides of the narration ?
Are we only interested in punishing those whom we believe are wrong ?

Have we realized the problem ?
Are we feeling bad for a boy in his 20s who thinks this country is his enemy ?
Are we thinking about how can we change this ?

Have we realized the problem ?

In the age of 1000 channels, and 500 breaking news a second,

Are we thinking about another family that might be going through the same crisis ?

Are we thinking about the people who feel alienated ?

Have we realized the problem ?

Why does a student hang himself to death?

Why does a student feel giving anti national slogans is the only option left ?

Why does a student feel killing them will save my world ?

Have we realized the problem ?

Is his world not important ?

Is his belief not important ?

While we know what turned him into becoming criminals 

Have we taken any step to not turn him into one or we are just doing the same thing again ?

May be we have realized the problem but the problem is way close to us, may be in our own house, in our own conversations that we do not want to handle it, we do not want to persuade it and perhaps we do not want to own it ?

Have we realized the problem ?

Lets converse and find out each other's stories before.....its too late...

There are no universal heroes...

               First we need to understand what is a hero...who is a hero...? many years back in my history classes we were taught about heroes of India. The list included greats from history like King Ashoka, ShivajiRaje Bhosle , Mughal Emperor Akbar, later freedom fighters like Lokmanya Tilak and Mahatma Gandhi, Bhagat Singh, Bose and even Savarkar were introduced.

               We easily call some one a hero and also stick to our own beliefs that certain people are anti heroes. So what is a hero ? Hero essentially is an ordinary man who takes a challenge much bigger for him and successfully conquers it. Hero is a person who with time gets wise and brave, violent at times non violent.
                Today we have a generation who for years have been exposed to Films that has its own way of depicting a hero...but we forget a small thing...there are no universal heroes.. I will start with the example of Pakistani Army, I am using Pakistani Army to keep myself out of troubles..you are free to call me a chicken...

• For Pakistani citizens their army men are Heroes, let me put it this way, for most of the Pakistanis that will be the case...but for people in Baluchistan and may be for most people across the border Pakistani army are anti heroes or villains. 
• For average Kashmiris in the valleys, Separatists are worshiped as heroes and downwards as we enter Jammu the same men treated as evil or villains...popularly anti nationals..
• When some one burns down forests to create farms we call him hero for he is looking to feed the needy but for the species living in the forests this farmer is not a hero he is evil.
• We see activist who stand against the government for a small group of people for that small group these activist are hero and for the larger group they are villains...
• If Mahabharata would have been written from Karna's prospective all of Pandavs and even Krishna might have been termed as an anti hero and perhaps Duryodhan a true hero...

The whole point I am trying to make is that there are no universal heroes you as a person decide to take one side and whoever aligns with your thinking, whoever protects your fears is a hero for you...

As Indians we do need to understand that Hero is not an Indian concept, Krishna or Ram are not heroes..they don't change with time or become wise or brave...they are born wise, they are born brave..they don't change the world around them does, people with them do...( interpretations from articles by Devdutt)

To sum up the last example I have is again from Mahabharata

Krishna's elder brother Balram calls Duryodhan the real hero but you will not see Krishna abusing his brother or calling him Adharmi, Krishna only smiles and accepts it, because he understands that there are no universal heroes because every person has a different narrative and so the same for anti heroes...anti nationals...heroes and nationals...

Peshawar Attacks

What a father might have felt..........

I kissed his forehead asked him to be a good boy

I told him to study hard for I will be gifting him a toy

I was very sad I could not spend last weekend with him

I was unhappy I could not give him that ice cream

But I promised myself today evening when the doors open

I promised myself when he runs up to me

I will hug him and give him what he wants

I will give him the world if that is what he demands

But when I got there he was no where to be seen

What I saw was not him but something that resembled him

What I saw was two holes up his heart blood coming out of it

What all thought of it as blood was really my son's love for me...

#IndiaWithPakistan #HumanityFirst

So much to say...

So much to say....

My new year resolution of posting minimum posts on face book has changed things for me. Its help me do different things in life. I have started trying my hands on cooking, reading and playing pc games at times (still gives pleasure to me). But more importantly it has changed me as a person. The extremism that these social networking was inculcating in me has probably come down. This was the main reason for the reduced posts.  But then over last few weeks I was feeling I need to take my thoughts out on topics about which I did generally on the Face Book.

So what are those topics I have divided in this blog in four parts
Cricket, Movies, Elections and General.


Cricket

Last time I posted on Facebook India was struggling and that has not changed. What I find is its a team with talent but no aggression. Its a team with that is under performing and mostly disappointing their talent more than anything.

Is there anything that can be changed ?

Perhaps Coach as most starting with Sunny said. I say possibly have a better search for good bowlers and groom them. Have an exclusive bowling coach. A Srinath or then why not a Mcgrath. BCCI can afford the best. For general discipline to get in a Dravid can do wonders...hopefully the selection panel would think on this....

Movies

Last time I posted on Facebook we were seeing some big movies to do well. For instance Gunday or then Gulaab Gang. Both bombed for good. What worked was non conventional cinema. I happened to watch only one movie but it was the best I seen in a very long time. Fandry...just awesome...its a slap on the face of society that includes me. If you saw Fandry and you did not feel the slap on your face you are probably insensitive to the problems.

Election

Aah the big one. Kejriwal was set to do wonders the last time I posted on Facebook. But it was too end in an anti climax. My two cents for every political party and to the people who are generally seen debating over the internet.

Be loyal to India, to your ideology, be loyal to the vision, not to a Modi, Rahul or Arvind, or a Mamta or Jaya... This is not their problem, this is a problem in them. We worship these leaders like GOD.  I see people more upset when they see some one comment against their favorite leader. But how many of us get upset when the driver from a car opens his windshield and spits on the road. How many of us gets upset when we see a shop keeper asking to forget about the receipts so he can save taxes,

Rather why are we not upset with ourselves for not able to stick to these principles. Believe me no GOD is going to save this country. Its only we and we alone together can do it.

Whom should I vote then ? Vote anybody and have good reasons for it. Keep the reasons to yourself. You are not required to defend them in public that serves no good. Influence people to follow the laws, to keep our city clean, to help each other. Stop wasting time in canvasing for parties our your favorite leader. They have man power and money to do it themselves.

What should parties do ?
Stop playing hatred politics. This message mainly for AAP whom I truly think can do these changes. WHY ? Because they are new, the clay is still wet. They can shape it more easily. AAP is trying to work on a plan to have a larger impact on the 2014 election. But lets look beyond May 16. AAP can come with a structure. Assign one person for every lok sabha constituency. Every assembly ward, every small section. Have a structure, of people who work for the citizens. They help them solve their problems over the years. Make these faces known to general public. So when the next election comes instead of telling what wrong others did you stand up and tell what right you are doing all these years. AND THAT IS ALTERNATIVE POLITICS...

General

Generally I feel  we need to all get more social than on social network. I did a trek, went out on small trips. I sit with my family more often like before. When I get up in the morning I am not thinking why my posts don't have likes or have them been read or not. I am not arguing or differing on sites with people.

I am using internet as a slave than let it master me.... try this out...keep yourself out of facebook, whatsapp for a while..walk out to the street see that newspaper boy, see that bus conductor...observe the ticket checker...they all are posting some thing and they all are real...stop creating an Avatar on the facebook (like this is the guy who supports this party, this cricketer, this kind of life etc) and be flexible. At times be yourself...at times be just opposite of what you can ever be...even if you cannot paint take a brush and just rubs some lines. Even if you cannot sing, just say any song close to your heart...and when you are about to sleep don't see what was the last post on facebook...open a dairy and list down what good you did today, how you made some one else happy...

Where to start from ?

....it is the most difficult question, but a question that needs an answer. 2014 election is coming and is coming soon.

No this blog is not to advertise about any party my personal views about any party is not something I would like to highlight here.



go to any news site, any news paper any blogs it seems the whole battle it between the political parties the candidates proposed by them. But honestly the battle is between us. No it is not between ideologies.

Government needs to provide the facilities that the citizens deserve. They have a job to do. We have a job to elect the right people to do the job. Yeah none of the above is a new button added but every time
you press that button it means you have lost trust in all the candidates.

This blog is for all of those who wants to press the none of the above button. You have still a few months ahead. Request to not just wake up from sleep and go to the booth and press that button. That won't help anyone and that least cannot make you any proud citizen.

Then what to do ? Yes where to start from.

1. Find if you are registered voter. your journey to press the none of the above button might even end before it starts if you are not registered,
2. Yes, I am register, now meet the local representative of each party, hold on what ?